For the pleasure of your ears =)

Monday, August 16, 2010

It's all gone

I still remember what Amanda's mum told me once upon a time:

Open up your vision of the world and your life will be a whole lot different.

Well,when her mum told me that time,I wasn't really bother to understand what it actually means. Perhaps the little-bit-matured-TC can understand what it's about now.

It seems near impossible to relate that quotes to my life. As many people may know,I dedicated my life to studies. Reason? I think being good in studies will bring me friends and respect from them. It's childish to think that way. Well,right till now I'm still childish to think that way. Getting good results bring me a sense of honour. It makes me feel good about myself.

Ya it's true. So what being good in studies? It doesn't guarantee you a good life when you step into the society to work. To make me look more childish,it doesn't guarantee you friends and respect from them as well. Mayb it does,but without a good personality,even getting a good results doesn't guarantee respect from others.

I ought to agree with those people saying my life is dull...very dull indeed. There's people giving the "you're a nuts" look as I always study. Even Sook Yi's words kept appearing in my mind now: You're abnormal.

I miss out a lot of things in my teenage years. I'm nothing good besides study. I don't know how to play music instrument. I don't know how to swim(I know know breatstroke). I doesn't achieven anything besides study in my life so far.

When I was a primary students,I wasn't that kind of student which always study. My life during primary was so wasted. I regreted it so much. It's all my fault. Not showing interest in everything around me. Up to secondary,I'm pretty much the same person during form one. But when it came to form two,I changed. All I ever think in my life is study,study and study. And this thinking grew even stronger during form three. PMR. I put a lot of pressure on myself wanting to achieve straight As in PMR. Study like a mad bull dog and getting those 8As. Perhaps it doesn't feel great at all in achieving this. I mean,no offence to others. I dare to say I put in a whole lot more of effort than many people. And what it turnt out was even though those people put lesser effort than me they also achieve the same as what I achieved. And you see,these people enjoy their form three life a whole lot more than me while I was trying my very best to achieve straight As for PMR during my form three life.

Sigh,I wished so much I have enjoy my life before this a whole lot more better than what I did. Well,when you're in form four,that chance won't happen that frequently. The time for childhood fun is nearly over. SPM...a platform for you to enter the labour world and earn a living. Can I told myself it's still early during form four and I still can enjoy before SPM? It would be stupid to think like that now. Form 4 is not a honeymoon year. I agreed with teachers. I must work hard to have a good base to survive during form 5 and SPM.

It's all gone. The chance to have a fun childhood. So much regretted. Mayb that's just me. A person who dunno enjoy the world and my life.

Last but not least to say,I would cherish every moment that I could have fun now and later in my remaining secondary life. Althought I might not be able to change from a student who thinks study is everything to a teenager who thinks enjoying life is also important,I really hope my remaining teenage life can be eventful and fun.

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